5 Days of Christ Centered Character Training: Day 1 How We Do It

Happy Monday Bloggy World!  Thank you very much for stopping by today.  I hope you come back all week because I’m going to be writing about a topic I’ve grown very passionate about in recent years…. Christ Centered Character Training.  First let me back up and tell you a bit about how we discipline and train our children so that you can understand where I am coming from on these topics.

ChristCenteredCharacterTraining

My husband and I hold a few things to be sacred in our parenting.  First, we do not hit/swat/spank or inflict any sort of physical pain on our children ever.  In our minds if it isn’t acceptable to for them to do that sort of thing than it isn’t for us either.  Second, we strive not to yell (and yes I do fall short here).  That doesn’t mean we don’t raise a voice when a strong and commanding voice is needed.  But yelling out of frustration is a no no for anyone in our home.  Third, we require obedience upon the first request.  This last one always has and most likely always will be a work in progress… but generally our children do do as they are told the first time they are told.  Four, our goal is that everyone in our home exhibits encouraging Christ like behavior with one another.  Yep, this one two is and likely always will be a work in progress.  And finally fifth, we use the Bible as our guide in everything in life, including parenting and Character Training.

When I sat down to begin this series I asked my children to tell me which training topics they thought I should write about.  This week you’ll find posts on: fighting, complaining, fear, jealousy, and impatience.  I suppose that list gives you a little insight into the issues we most often need to address in our family.

What Does Christ Centered Character Training Look Like?

Whenever an issue such as the once listed above erupts in our home I typically send the children to different spaces to cool off a bit.  After a few minutes I call them back together so that I can from each of them.  Often I know it is time to open up God’s word and review with my children what He says about the issue at hand.  Sometimes I don’t even get the pages open. We’ve used the Bible so much as our source for living that my children can often tell me what it’s going to say before I even get it out.  I’ve discovered in the past couple of years that only addressing a problem behavior in the moment isn’t as effective as I want it to be.  When I notice a pattern of behavior in our home I take the time to discuss it during our morning devotionals.  Together we look up pertinent versus.  We discuss what we think God means with those words and how we can use them the next time we find ourselves in difficult situation.  

How To Prepare

Of course I’m not all that talented at finding the right versus. This takes a bit of thought, prayer and preparation. I like to use the app YouVersion on my Kindle Fire or other sites like ESVBible.org to look up keywords.  An actual Bible Concordance would of course work fabulously!  One of my other favorite resources that I speak of often is the Child Training Bible.  With these resources I can usually compile a list of versus that will help me address the issue at hand.

Then the real work begins.  In our home I know we have to open our time together discussing the word with prayer and often a praise song.  My children will testify, if we do not our hearts are not in the right place and we do not listen well.  Then I read the scriptures (or have my children read them) aloud and dissect each one.  As we go, someone inevitably remembers a time when they didn’t follow God’s word in some way.  I encourage them to share.  As a rule the children aren’t aloud to tattle or remark on when someone ELSE didn’t follow God’s word.  However, Mommy can ask pointed questions to job everyone’s memories.

We’ll follow this pattern for a week or so… choosing one standout verse to memorize.  Then we move on.  Often times we find some mantra… three or four words, that we can use with one another to remind us of what God taught us during our study.  For example, during a time of study about quarreling we found 2nd Timothy 2:23-24

 23Don’t have anything to do with foolish and stupid arguments, because you know they produce quarrels.24 And the Lord’s servant must not be quarrelsome but must be kind to everyone, able to teach, not resentful. 
Now, several months later, when I hear a quarrel erupt I just have to ask if this argument would be foolish and stupid to the Lord.  Typically that ends things right there and they strive to find a way to work things out. Almost without fail any pattern of behavior is significantly reduced after just a few days of reading about it in the Word and praying to God to help us work it out.

The Fruits of Our Labor

Sometimes, in the weary moments when behaviors I thought we had addressed come blazing back (because most likely to always do, at least for a time) I ask myself why I bothered putting in the effort.  Then one evening my 6 year old son climbed into my lap.  He looked up at me with his big blue eyes and said… “Thank you Mommy for talking about quarreling this morning.  It helped me all day.”  SOB!  Thank you God for the encouragement.

More to Come!

Come back all week as I share with you about some of the specific topics we’ve addressed with this method (I’ll be talking about Fighting, Complaining, and Fear among others).  You won’t want to miss it.
If you use the Bible in your home in a similar manner please leave an encouraging story in the comments.  I know all of us Moms could use it!
Many members of the TOS Review Crew are blogging about a variety of topics this week.  Please stop by their blogs.  They’ve chosen some fabulous topics to write about for you.
Brittney @ Mom’s Heart ~ Relaxed Homeschooling
Lisa @ A Rup Life ~ Our Favorite Books
Melissa @ Life Off the Paved Road ~ Fit From Home
Michelle @ Faith, Family, and Fridays ~ Clearing Out the Clutter
Jennifer @ Chestnut Grove Academy ~ Educational Apps
Jenni @ Conversaving ~ Homeschool Cooperatives
Lisa @ Home to 4 Kiddos ~ Celebrating Lent
Tawnee @ Adventures in Homeschooling ~ Spring Schooling

April Blog Hop

 

 

Comments

  1. Great post! We too have the Child Training Bible, but I have gotten out of the habit of turning to it. Thank you for the reminder that that is the FIRST place I should head for Biblical training. There is nothing more important. Looking forward to reading your week’s posts!

  2. Looks like this is going to be a great series Crystal! Can’t wait to come back tomorrow for more!

  3. Great topic! I look forward to reading more!

  4. Crystal, I believe this is going to be a wonderful series!

  5. Thank you so much for this encouragement. I used this approach last week when some deception and dishonesty appeared in our home from one child. I had him copy verses from the For Instruction in Righteousness from Doorposts. I wish I could say this is my first route of instruction. A work in progress.

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